Entry 5

So today i woke up feeling much better than yesterday, apart from the fact that i had a very realistic dream in which i was very upset and distressed because i was with my boyfriend and he told me that he wouldn’t be able to see me the weekend after, and this triggered me. Then the dream carried on into the week where i continued to be very distressed  and angry/sad. So when i did wake up and realise it was a dream, i was slightly confused and worried that what happened in the dream would come true and i wouldn’t be able to cope with the ‘abandonment’. It is my last day at my boyfriends house and i am going home at 19:20 this evening, so i am hoping the sadness and ‘depression’ will wait until i get home to show itself. I usually find the last day very hard and i really want to ask my boyfriend when i will be seeing him next so i can get it straight in my head and so i can prepare myself, but i feel like it will come across as me being too needy/clingy. I aim to ask him before i leave, so i won’t have to worry all night about asking him.

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