Entry 20

I woke up early today. 07:30. I went to visit my great granddad with my mum and sister. We had some breakfast when we got there and stayed for about an hour. I was so tired on the way home that i ended up having a nap when we got back, until 14:30, when i had to get up to go to my doctors appointment. The appointment with the mental health nurse went really well. I ended up getting him to refer me to a mental health team that will give me a full assessment, and then hopefully an official diagnosis. After that, i will start attending ‘coping with emotions’/DBT, therapy group sessions. I have never had group therapy sessions before, but at this point, i am willing to try anything. As well as that, he prescribed me some Diazepam, for the really bad days. I told him about my boyfriend going out drinking next week, and how much i have been worrying and panicking about it. So he told me to have a couple throughout the day to calm me down, and then 2 at night when he goes out, to knock me out. This has really helped to ease my worry because i don’t know how i would’ve got through that night otherwise. So overall, i think going to the doctors has really lifted my mood, and given me some hope. When i got back from the doctors, i had another nap. I think i find those things quite emotionally draining, so i slept from about 16:30 until 20:30. I spend so much of my days asleep lately. Hopefully that will change when i am more motivated to get up and do things. Hopefully the therapy will help with that. There is a waiting list, and it will take some time, but hopefully, not too much time, because i am ready to get better.

3 thoughts on “Entry 20

  1. Hey, I just want to let you know that I understand exactly what youre going through, and I know its crippling… I am 18 and I knew things were off about me since I was little, but just recently I have been able to connect it to BPD. Their initial diagnosis when i was 15 was low spectrum autism, but I believe that was only because they tend not to diagnose minors with BPD.I got diagnosed with BPD within the last two months and was put on Tofranil, Lamictal, and Abilify but I am terrible at keeping up with them. Every day is a struggle just to get through… Youre not alone.

    Liked by 1 person

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